Posted by: David | December 28, 2010

That Darn Cat

This morning around 3:45 we were awakened by a crashing sound that made the dog start growling. I got up to investigate. The cat! She froze guiltily at the top of the cellar stairs. The cooking timer lay upside down on the kitchen floor, disemboweled. Its D-cell and battery compartment cover clear across the room. Silly cat was prowling the kitchen counters and stove top in the wee hours. She’s got a very early start on her winter cabin fever.

Where’s my kibble? I need some kibble. Now please. Yes. More kibble. In the blue bowl. What? That was hours ago! Yesterday even! Last week! Whatever, I can’t tell time. I’m bored. FEED ME.

The cat has a very short attention span. When the ground isn’t covered with snow she spends her days outside murdering birds and small rodents. When trapped indoors she falls into a state of depressed ennui which she tries to blot out with endless requests for more cat kibble. Her method of requesting kibble is to pace and leap onto the dryer every time she thinks you’re looking at her. Her other therapy, this year, has been to try out all kinds of new places to sleep. She’s found like 5 new places so far.

Under the xmas tree bush plant, post gift distribution. Maybe cat wanted to be present. HAR!

Here she is on top of the upright freezer, which is next to the washer and dryer.

I forgot to mention that the ground outside is now covered with real snow. We got hit by the same big blizzard that got Boston and NYC and places further south. A solid foot of nice, dense powder. The house made its creaking sounds through the night as it took on the weight of the snow. It was a bit confusing when the National Weather Service cancelled the Winter Storm Warning by replacing it with a Blizzard Warning.  Meaning it’s gonna be a bad snow storm, plus all blowy like. Which it was. The first round of snowblowing yesterday, to clear out the garage and driveway as per snow removal triage protocols, was hideous. There’s nothing less enjoyable than blowing snow in 30+mph winds. Well maybe watching Lawrence Welk reruns is less enjoyable. Did I mention that I’m an ass?

Anyway, it’s really, really winter now. But the sun is on it’s way back north. Hallelujah. Sunrise on hills west of our place.

Sunset after the blizzard moved off. See snowblower track in snow. You can’t see the awful wind.

The days of the holiday break tick by all too quickly. I fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way. That was a Pink Floyd reference kids. I’m also reading books. Still trying to finish What Technology Wants, by Kevin Kelly. It’s a scholarly tome, with some breathtaking cosmological concepts, but too many words for my tiny brain. I’m a patient man, but the last 100 pages are trying me. I think I get it already, maybe not. The technium, as he coins it, is the inevitable offshoot of intelligent self-replicating life forms such as we humans are. The boundary between creator and created blurs as our inventions grow in complexity, scale, and sentience. Ever since HAL 9000 I figured that was the goal- to create a computer “son of man”. A self aware sentient being with computational power as only god should have. Should we fear or embrace what we are about to give birth to? I will finish this book.

In the meantime I had to pick up another book, loaned by a coworker. Fiction. It’s called A Dirty Job, by Christopher Moore. It was hilarious and disturbing. An unexpected combination of life, death, transcendence of souls, mourning, and squirrel people. Squirrel people in adorable little costumes. It was a good enough read to get me to the library for another title by this same author.

Next up: Lamb, the gospel according to Biff, Christ’s childhood pal.

That’s all for now. Thanks for your attention. It’s been a wonderful decade, hasn’t it?


  1. Haha! I’ve never actually seen the Lawrence Welk show, but for some reason his name his name makes me laugh. Same with Burt Bacharach. Oh, and Turd Ferguson, but that goes without saying.

    I really need to get glasses, when I saw the third photo I could have sworn your cat was holding a camera!

    Thanks for visiting and commenting bschooled! It’s an honor! I don’t know what took me so long to add Just Making Convo to my blogroll. Please accept my apologies. I’m slow.

    Re: Welk, you are lucky then. The show usually opened with bubbles flying around behind the opening title. Supposed to be champagne bubbles I guess. Didn’t matter because after 1 minute the show induced deep REM sleep in anyone under the age of 90 (with any luck). People 90 and up, the target audience, were already asleep you see … Think kitschy schmaltz (or schmaltzy kitsch) to the 100th power PLUS an orchestra. Think elevator music from the 1960s meets Hee-Haw without the comedy. Never mind, that was a bad analogy. Really bad.

    I see what you mean about the cat photo. It sorta does look like she’s holding a camera, an SLR with a large zoom lens. But no, it’s really just a loose roll of black trash bags. Nevertheless, maybe you should look into getting glasses. Cheap readers from the pharmacy worked for quite a while for me, starting with the 1.25X and working my way up until the eye doc said it was time for old people glasses. Well she didn’t say it that way exactly.

  2. Maybe cat wanted a present.

    Probably. Neither pet got anything this year. They were very bad pets. 😦

  3. Such a pretty little kitty. Love the ‘sleep testing’. I wonder if I can get a job doing that. Love your blog, DL!

    Thanks Maleesha. Love your blog too! So far, Hunter’s (cat’s name = Hunter) fave place is under the xmas tree plant. Calling it that because it’s a houseplant. Some kind of droopy piney thing we don’t really know the name of. It’s been our xmas tree for 2 years now. Which is fine with me. Next year my wife says we’re getting a ‘real’ tree. For the grandchild and all. 🙂 And we’ll have the goose with the razzle berry dressing (sorry, a Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol reference).

  4. I work at Library. Haven’t read that Author. Q: Do you have an eReader? What sort? Do you like it? Do you have opinions on eReaders?

    Thanks! (Endevouring to get free Tech advice.)

    I don’t have an eReader, but I would like to get something along those lines. A few friends at work have the Apple iPads and they are very sexy. I want more functionality in a tablet than just a reader and I would pay the $500 for it. I like books. Paper books. And magazines. Not to say that I don’t waste oodles and oodles of time on our dear interwebs … That said, other friends at work like their readers. One has a Kindle, one has a Nook. Sorry I’m not providing much in the way of advice. I guess my overall opinion is that I don’t really want one yet, but am still waiting for more features. I suppose the tablet will soon arrive that does everything, phone, camera, computer, and is green. I’m waiting. By then it should cost around $300, solar charge itself, and be trade-in worthy for the next model. Probably another 5 years.

    • …oh, and nice photos.

      Thanks Sle. I see you have lots of photos over on your blog too!

  5. But if you wait long enough they will come free along with a kilo pack of lentils.

    I have not even seen the famous iPad, but as to the Kindle I do know from my short incursion or excursion into HubPages that bloggers that sell them get very big commissions and so they all tried very hard.

    And if I understand correctly, the Kindle is only for the things specifically published by Amazon for KIndle. Now if this is true and you buy one you subsidize a new kind of censorship.

    That settles it. I’m waiting for the kilo of lentils.

    The iPad is a very elegant gadget.

    It’s not censorship, it’s marketing. If you buy the book in German, should you not have to buy it again in the English translation?

  6. Omg, you’ll turn this into a book blog yet! I have Christopher Moore on my tbr and I will start with his earlie stuff, I think. harsh & hilarious is my impression.
    The tech book looks terrific! I wonder if any of my friends has read it. you must get into goodreads! Its fun. Heeheehee….
    I adore my iPAD!!

    Thanks Care, I’ll leave that booky stuff to you. I don’t really read enough. I was in goodreads, but, darn, I just don’t read enough. Too much time on the interwebs. The tech book was good, but could have been half as many pages and still made its points. Technology is to humanity as apples are to apple trees. The apple seed “wants” to become an apple tree, making more copies of itself, and has all the information needed to do so. The ‘technium’ as Kevin Kelly names it, is our baby, and we should love it, and try to make sure that it doesn’t grow up and try to kill us. Normal parenting procedure, right?

    I’m glad you like your iPad. I want one too. Someday.

  7. David! I love Christopher Moore! He’s one of my all-time favorites, and Lamb is my favorite of his books. I’m so glad you’re reading him!

    I was at your place of work on Friday, but didn’t see you! 😦 Next time, next time.

    Hi Abby, sorry to have missed you. It sounds from the interwebs as though your NH time was quite enjoyable. Happy new year and have a great semester. I’m soaking in Lamb right now, a little slowly. I loved A Dirty Job!. He’s hilarious. What do you recommend I read after Lamb?

    • Happy new year to you, too! Hmm, Lamb is excellent… but my next favorite is probably Bloodsucking Fiends (although I haven’t read it in years… can’t say how I’d feel about it if I read it again now). It has two sequels (You Suck and Bite Me), but I hated You Suck and only thought Bite Me was okay. Dirty Job actually has a few characters who do cameos from Bloodsucking Fiends… although you’ll notice most of his books have that sort of thing (i.e., there’s a demon you’ll meet in Lamb who is the demon from Practical Demonkeeping). Another pretty good one is Island of the Sequined Love Nun. All of his books are worth a read, though, but some of them are better than others. Also, if you are familiar with Shakespeare you might like Fool. Ostensibly it’s a re-imagining of King Lear, but it’s got lots of other Shakespeare thrown in for good measure (and judging from the plot of Fool I’m not convinced that he’s ever even read King Lear, but that’s okay I guess).

      Whew, okay, I think I’m a little too obsessed…

      What a great comment Abby. Thank you. I could reuse it as a guest blog post. 😀

      I’m liking Lamb but reading it much too slowly as all my other entertainments are taking priority over the good old-fashioned reading of books. I snarfed up A Dirty Job while on holiday break. Lamb is going slower for some reason. I think my frontal cortex has to process the story bits a little more due to the religious entanglements. Jesus must’ve been a darn cute kid! I almost took Fool from the Newbury Public Library, but the librarian said I should try Lamb first. I took her advice. She’s smart like that. I love librarians!

      I think I may have read King Lear, but not sure. I’m pretty much illiterate. I know I’ve read at least one each of the comedies and tragedies. I like anything ostensible. So I guess I’ll stop there.

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