We’d had a perfectly lovely Thanksgiving Day with my wife’s sister’s family, over the river and through the woods. Hope you did too. On Black Friday we rested. Day off. We hung about indoors all day long. I did anyway. My wife had to go out to do chores in the barn morning and evening. I never went outside once! That felt weird but it was stormy and raw out there. My wife worked her crossword puzzles before firing up her computer. I pointed my browser, right after breakfast, to Hulu and watched the rest of my queue. Which was Fringe, Lie to Me, and V. Actually I’d watched episode 4 of V on “real” TV, so I just deleted it from the Hulu queue. That seems funny somehow? Then I watched a few Flash Forwards. Not sure about that show yet. I also read some magazine bits in between. Rolling Stone, New Yorker, Wired, etc. Then I watched almost all available episodes of Peep Show, early work of those two Limey nutbags David Mitchell and Robert Webb. They’re LOL. That was a lot of time on the Hulu. I was tired and went to bed around 10.
Our TV’s been on the blink. A couple of weeks ago it began firing warning shots. The picture would shrink to a 6 or 7 inch white band in the middle of the screen. Like it was winking at us. One night last week it kept the wink going. It turned the TV on and off about 5 times, but it stayed winked. So we’ve been figuring it would soon be time to replace and upgrade that important appliance. We were still using ancient analog TV technology. The Black Friday Flyers stuffed into our newspapers and mailbox got this flame fully fanned. And on Saturday, at noon, we were on the road to Claremont, where KMart/Sears was our first target. Our price point was $500. My wife and I went to buy a TV. Together. A highly improbable event. It cost us $1 to get into the store, and the Salvation Army Dude was a nice young hippie guy who actually did a little shuffle up for us. Priceless. OK, not priceless. One dollar.
The KMart/Sears TV selection sucked. Just like Rain Man said. They had about 10 TVs in the very back corner of the store, like where the restrooms are. Most were in the $1000 price range. Crap. At least there were no salespeople trying to pester us. The last cluster of them we passed were in the lawn and garden section. What a stupid place to cluster up after Thanksgiving, huh? Whatever. We would need to go elsewhere. That meant Walmart. And maybe BestBuy in Lebanon as Plan C. I’ve been to this Walmart about 6 times now. I never like it. It smells funny in there. The Salvation Army Dude there was also a young hippie guy. What up SA?
Anyway, the selection there was much better. They had about 50 TVs up and going on the walls. Norah Jones was on a lot of them. Sigh. I love her. We walked back and forth a few times looking at all the TVs. I had decided, in a silent internal way, that I didn’t need to listen/talk to any salespeople, since I’d done the minimal prerequisite Googling on this topic and knew my plasma from my LCD, etc. But as were hovering between Plan C and Making A Choice, we found the stack of boxes on the pallets and had to ask someone something and got the basic chat-up of LCD vs. plasma, blah blah blah. In the end we Made The Choice. A Samsung 42″ 1080p LCD for $600. I also needed some new underwear so the TV and a 7-pack of Hanes was what we went through the checkout with. The cashier thought it an odd combination of items. Yeah. It kinda was.
We got home and were setting up the new TV by 3 o’clock. It took a little messing around to get the old TV out and the new one hooked up to the DVD player and Dish DVR. But it worked and it was awesome. Here’s where the title of this post comes in. After all that crap I watched yesterday on Hulu, then going through the surrealistic TV purchase (I know– this doesn’t qualify as “real” surrealism to “normal” people) at Walmart, I decided to watch the DVD my friend Kelli loaned me, The Plan, followed by almost all of THX1138, the director’s cut, a gift from my BFF. I stopped THX1138 when my wife finally came downstairs to watch the new TV. I handed over the remote and the La-Z-Boy chair. She switched between Chopped and Color Splash for a while until 10 o’clock rolled around and I heard the internet calling me. So I went upstairs. And I wrote this blog post. And now I’m really tired.
This should have been posted last night, but apparently I was too tired to hit the Publish button.